I have been neglecting my blog in part, because I have entered the world of
academia. Well, sort of. I have begun teaching a basic writing course
– remedial English – at a local community college near where I live. It has been an interesting experience. I am what they call an adjunct
instructor. That means that I am not
faculty, but more like a contract employee, hired to teach per class. I don’t get paid much, but it is more than I
was making as a free-lance writer this past year, and the paycheck is
steadier.
When I was younger, I used to imagine being a college
professor. I would see myself in some
sort of hip outfit, pulling into my reserved faculty parking space in a cool
little retro MG with the top down, stepping out with a worn leather messenger
bag full of papers to grade and a latte in hand as I strolled confidently into
a cathedral of a building that would be home to the English department. Not MY English department, mind you. I would be much too busy writing and touring
the country promoting my latest novel to run a department. My students would love me; they would fall
all over themselves to try and impress me.
They would ooooh and aaaah at all of my lectures on lofty literary
topics such as “Images of Evil in the Romantic Poetry of Alfred Lord Tennyson,”
and the wait list for my creative writing class would be over a year.
That is what I imagined.
That is nothing like what I am doing.
I am pulling up to an industrial building in my black
minivan and wheeling a milk crate full of papers that I have already graded
into an office only slightly larger than my closet at home that I share with
another adjunct who teaches on the days that I am not here.
I have students who like me, certainly, but they are all
striving to do as little as possible to at least manage the C required to make
it out of my class and into English 101.
There are a few exceptions, of course.
Out of nearly 70 students, I have maybe 20 that have serious
potential. They are the students who are
actually here to learn. They either have
never tried, or they were never taught, but they are capable. They think that I am funny, they say that I
am their favorite teacher, and that no one has ever broken down English and
writing for them as simply and effectively.
They try.
And then…
Then there are the rest of the students. The ones who have missed 9 out of 12 class
meetings, the ones who have turned in 3 out of 15 assignments, and the ones who
have yet to complete a single weekly journal.
They are halfway through the semester and have a daily average of 14, a
journal average of 10, and a test average of 0 because they failed to turn in
the take-home test that they were given 5 days to complete. They are the ones that I want to kick
out. I want to hand them a pink slip and
show them the door, but I cannot.
Community college is state funded.
I am prohibited from using attendance as a grading tool. (Why it is okay to use attendance as a
grading tool in state funded primary and high school, but not okay in community
college, I have no idea.) In my
assessment, it was suggested that I “soften my criticisms” and I wanted to tell
them that I already AM softening my criticisms.
My mother, who has been a teacher all of her adult life and
is now retired, asked me how I was enjoying it.
I told her “I love teaching. I
despise grading. I look forward to the
discussion of writing with the 10% of students who can follow what I am saying and
even the additional 20% who wish that they could follow it and make effort
to. I dread seeing the slackers. If I could only teach the students who wanted
to learn, it might be worth pursuing as a career, but it is okay as a job for
now.” She replied that the only way I
would get to teach just the students who wanted to learn was to go back to
school, get a doctorate, and teach 500 level courses to others attempting to
get their doctorate. I don’t want to do
that.
I’m not even sure that I want to do it again, which is good
since they do not have any classes available for me at the moment for next
semester. I have told them of my availability, and time
will tell if they have to create another section or two that fit those
parameters, but for now, at least, I am facing unemployment (again). Part of me is glad, honestly. I am looking forward to getting back on track
with my weight loss (which has morphed into “damage control”) and spending some
quality time in my yoga pants with my DVR.
And maybe even writing on my blog.
But now, I have 70 some odd essays to grade before Tuesday…joy.
