tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3678933503618590263.post4339911384515341104..comments2023-06-10T03:02:57.950-05:00Comments on Counting Caballeros: Teach Your Children WellCounting Caballeroshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12468483600948636452noreply@blogger.comBlogger7125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3678933503618590263.post-29394606963202941192012-11-01T05:06:56.493-05:002012-11-01T05:06:56.493-05:00This is so well said! I hope things go well with y...This is so well said! I hope things go well with your son. lupinssupinshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04558149015444796768noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3678933503618590263.post-66038953054086080902012-11-01T05:04:52.140-05:002012-11-01T05:04:52.140-05:00As the single mother of a son on the autism spectr...As the single mother of a son on the autism spectrum, I thank you for this! I have also signed the pledge to Spread the Word to End the Word [https://www.facebook.com/EndtheWord?ref=ts&fref=ts] <br />When I was teaching, my students [and even many of their parents] could not believe that my class rules prohibited them using the words "retarded" or "retard" as insults. I said that these [along with using "gay" as an insult] were as insulting as racial and ethnic slurs, and would be disciplined as such. They protested lamely that because "everyone says them," they can't be slurs. I was astonished that even some teachers held this view! I told my students that the last time I had used "the r-word" as an insult, I had just started first grade. I didn't even direct it at anyone, but had said of something, "that's just retarded!" My best school friend stopped me and said, very bravely for a 6 year old, "Please do NOT say that! My brother is retarded and you hurt my feelings!" She had such a hurt look in her eyes. In those days, sadly, it was most common for children with mental retardation [as it was called in the states where I taught until the current century] to be institutionalized. So it would not have been unusual that I hadn't even known about her brother. I felt so abashed at having hurt my friend that in the 50+ years since that day, I never used the word in that way again. As a teacher, every year that I went over my class rules, I would tell that story, expecting it to make some impression on my students. Every year, I was saddened that the ONLY ones who cared one iota were those who HAD a sibling with a developmental challenge, or teachers who had a child with one. In fact, students would mock my policy to other students! After I had left the middle school where I'd taught, I attended my son's play at the high school to which my students had graduated. As I left the building, one of the last to do so, in the dark, a group of students on the outside steps recognized me, but not in any friendly way. Instead of responding to my greeting them, they felt so free of my influence that they hooted derisively after me, "retarded, retarded, retarded!" and just laughed and laughed at their imagined cleverness. Carin is so right; teachers are no miracle workers. We cannot single-handedly undo what parents have wrought.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3678933503618590263.post-836330546998157502012-10-31T19:47:20.571-05:002012-10-31T19:47:20.571-05:00:) Thanks.:) Thanks.Psychojenichttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02936930614210195529noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3678933503618590263.post-64333088759675346232012-10-31T19:12:45.394-05:002012-10-31T19:12:45.394-05:00Thanks, Carin! You are one of my most loyal reade...Thanks, Carin! You are one of my most loyal readers, and I appreciate your comments so much! I had seen the crumpled piece of paper story too, I wish I had thought to incorporate it into the text! Lucky for me, you did it for me!!Counting Caballeroshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12468483600948636452noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3678933503618590263.post-72500514324386868252012-10-31T19:10:14.340-05:002012-10-31T19:10:14.340-05:00Thanks! You know, when you did your post about en...Thanks! You know, when you did your post about ending the "R-Word" it was a real wake up call for me. I hope that this post will lead others to your blog because it is so very good & full of useful information about being accepting. Blog on, momma! I'll keep educating myself!!Counting Caballeroshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12468483600948636452noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3678933503618590263.post-42824351034292389762012-10-31T14:49:35.728-05:002012-10-31T14:49:35.728-05:00Wow, so apt, so correct, so from the heart. I wish...Wow, so apt, so correct, so from the heart. I wish those who bullied me in the old days could read this. <br /><br />I once read this experiment on fb. A teacher gave her class a piece of paper and told them to crumple it up as much as they could.<br />When they were done, she told them to unfold it and flatten it as much as possible,<br />They found out they couldn't unwrinkle it. She then told them that those pieces of paper are bullied kids, and every wrinkle is a scar on their souls from every mean word, name calling and such.<br /><br />Last year I used this in my class and the bullying became less. It did not stop completely, but a referral to the pieces of paper was enough to lessen it again. <br /><br />Teachers are important, but we are no miracle workers. That is exactly why parents are even more important to impress values upon their kids, teach them how to treat other people with respect, show them how in every day life. <br /><br />Your son is fortunate to have you both as his parents , a warm nest. <br />Good luck, Lady G!Carinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01772941432871185321noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3678933503618590263.post-79257223129456947712012-10-31T12:31:22.906-05:002012-10-31T12:31:22.906-05:00Thanks Ginger. I wish more parents were like you....Thanks Ginger. I wish more parents were like you.<br />Stand firm with your bully ( look who I'm talking to lol). All the best--J.Psychojenichttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02936930614210195529noreply@blogger.com